The truth is

See the truth is, my whole life- I ran tired
Dwelt in a lie- of a soul been expired…
Stuck in the mud, I sunk in the mire,
Clinging to anything- with the illusions of aspire...

See the truth is- my childhood was painstaking,
Unmistakingly created from a life spawn from hatred,
Thoughts hated-
I took on the identity of the lies that sedated..

Unworthiness- worthlessness-
Worth farless than any drug, money,
or person that they possessed.
Slept awake in bed-
The whole time my mind obsessed,
Prayed routinely for my anger filled life to be repossessed..

See,
the lesson that I have learned-
The whole time I begged God for death-
It was my soul that yearned,
My mind cried out-
from drowned out screams of a heart been hurt..

It wasn't till I was locked up,
And seen the reality of my addiction,
Symptomatic of the separation that had me born into affliction-
A malice learned lifestyle-
Solely based on a fiction,
Been lifted from the pit of the cursed that I was gifted…

How great He is-
the Savior that has saved me,
From a ward of the state-
He adopted and bathed me..
Washed me clean-
He transformed and remade me..
Redeemed me from the darkness-
He chose me and He staked me..

Before the earth was framed a foundation was laid, see?
A plan of salvation every breath was
pre-seen.

Every footstep was pre-planned,
Every notion been preconceived,
Every heart was prepared,
For the reception of His seed-
    But now it's up to me…

My choice has been made,
And I chose to praise YOU!
Let every breath that I breath,
be of Glory unto YOU!
Let every Word that I speak,
Be of Holy Fire and of Truth…
Let nothing be of me,
     but only of YOU YOU YOU..

I thank You Lord God
for the good and the bad,
I thank You Almighty,
for the afflictions that were had.
I praise You Lord God for being my refuge,
But most of all Lord God,
I praise You for being You..

My God that can't deny-
divorce or divide Himself..
My God our Lord God,
While at my very worst,
You still gave Yourself..

I choose You Lord God,
I choose You over self,
Thank You for freedom-
From my selfcentered-
   nightmarish hell..