Fatiha

It’s another dull morning
I lie confused
Thinking what am I here for
Every time I feel to do something
I am pulled back
Like the sun
running away
From the demons of darkness
giving up in the end
to be imprisoned by the night
and the struggle continues

Couldn’t there be light
Showing me the path to traverse
In the vast seas of darkness
I shake my head violently
Hoping to shake out the restlessness
Like a fish out of water
Trying to breath life.

Am I destined to live this way
Caught in a web of dilemma
Like being sucked out slowly…
By the spiders of helplessness
I am forced to drift in the ocean
And from the shores
When I reflect upon me
I find myself still
Across the vast horizon

Mad rush of the world
People running in every direction
Each believing in their
Own right way
Chasing a mirage of victory.

Utterly confounded am I
Desperate to carve a niche of my own
I end up drawing a full circle
Chorus of hollow laughters hit me
The naked empty happiness shrouds over
Living with the illusions
Wrapped up in the fateful misery
Struggling to remain alive
I have become a living dead.

I don’t know what I fathom
Neither do I know what I desire
Numb, shivering, burning
Moments come and go
Nothing stirs me anymore
Have I accepted it all
Watching the time go by
Killing everything
Which was once alive
Carving a history
To be told to newborns
This is the way you will end up
Unable to hear the dreaded truth
I have turned into an ageless stone.

Sometimes I ask myself a question
Is discarding all, what is there
Easier than embracing it all
Why cant I hope for the better
Strive to reach the unreachable
After all that is the way
Its meant to be
You only run
When the end is not in sight
Trying to untangle the ropes
Seeking to solve the riddle
I lose my way again

Like a snake coiling itself
When it seems the inevitable doom
I let out a sigh
And close my eyes
Last attempt I make
To churn out the poetry of life
Only to realize later
I’m writing my own “phatiha”