Heavy

I'm heavy, there's a weight in my chest, it's dragging me down and I'm tired. I should shake it off but some sick part of me hangs onto it, like its proof I love you, proof that my heart wants you. Maybe I'm waiting for you to save me, but I don't wanna cry out. I keep sinking silently. Feeling detached and clinging. It makes no sense, I know, but I want to feel you lift me, feel you drag your lips over me, reclaim or revive me. But I feel like I'm choking, maybe I'm an addict and can never get enough. The moment you hands graze then move I'm already thirsting for more. I just feel heavy, like I'm sinking, drowning, in desire and I wanna detach but I need you, need this... do you love me, I need the constant reassurance of an amnesia patient. The air here is too thick.