Suicidal Diary

Suicidal Diary

Fraught Friday

The afternoon rain compounded the remains of the day with an ongoing cumbrous seizure, then realigning, recovering, and reassembling all over again the memories, thoughts, and cognitive reasons of this agonizing reoccurring existence.

Sedentary Saturday   

The allotted hour lodges upon the softness of the morning as seconds languish by in harried and chaotic disorder, stiff unrestrained drinks stifle the misery in pigments of dark unconsciousness of care, for the hour is very near.

Sacred Sunday

The owl-lit hours fall into the break of morning. Shall I worship an unbelievable myth today?  Questions seize every mood as culpability maligns every thought as the forgiving sunlight rescues the moment.

Mundane Monday

Habitual recourse after recourse concludes every hour, monotony thrives upon the weak, enraptures and captures the frailty of the didactic reason to trudge through this solitary confinement and the ventral trouncing of self-defeat.

Torturous Tuesday

The homily despaired curse immediately overwhelms everything, the scurrility searches out every weakness and stronghold, there’s no sidestepping or evading this cursed sickness, you’re your own enemy.

Withered Wednesday

This symbiotic conjunction of Thorazine, Valium and alcohol doles out in repetitive grams and shots of grateful solitude is the daily prescribed requirement of staying keel-keened.

Terminal Thursday

The golden hour was at hand when the watchman was away, the undulating throes of resignation overtook the morning, you conquered all your devoted ghosts but left the enduring demon behind.

* My dad took his life on that memorial day of

   December 31, 1981.