THE RISK TAKER

THE RISK TAKER

A question on insurance forms
Highlights the risk beyond the norms
And though she was a little frail
Her sport some danger did entail
So on the line that asked her sport
Extremes of ironing wry smiles bought
The agent thought the risk was small
That this little old lady was in danger at all
So he took the money on a contract signed
And dismissed this pensioner from his mind

The agent sent on a management course
To climb up mountains or ride a horse
Was more than a little taken aback
By a little old lady with a pink rucksack
When she rode past him up Scarfell Pike
With an ironing board strapped to her bike
And with his mind in a curious spin
As to how the hell she could plug an iron in
But then he saw her coming down
To freewheel past his pensive frown

On his day off he would scuba dive?
In a quiet bay near to St Ives
And to relax and have some fun
Would hunt for sharks with a spear gun
But on the day he made his dive
With a feeling of fitness and coming alive
Who did he find upon the seabed
But a little old lady ironing something red
Fighting off sharks with whatever it takes
No iron on the board just two lead weights

On a whim he bought a microlite
To learn to fly he thought he might
And with full tanks took to the air
To ride the thermals with no care
He noticed shadows on the ground
Of something weird freefall earthbound
But as he swerved to avoid the crash
Something passed by in lighting flash
A little old lady at an ironing board
She had her iron but no ripcord

Beset by angst and true dismay
Vowed to call on her the very next day
But when he knocked upon her door
A lion’s roar he heard for sure
And through the window when he looked
Saw three big cats from a circus booked
With a little old lady at an ironing board
No whip or chair to keep accord
Her only weapon a jet of steam
And the ironing folded seam to seam

Next time you chance to look up at the moon
To see the face of a man in the slivery gloom
Just think of the lady that’s on her way there
To iron out those ceases without a care
She’s training now for the shuttles next trip
With her ironing board ready to let it all rip
And the next time they put up an American flag
It will be freshly ironed not out of a bag
But if you are worried then be reassured
This ironer extreme will be well insured

JP.