Analysis of My story

DREAM
Well atleast i thought it was
But when i blinked twice i realized
It was reality sometimes i wish it
Was a dream  
Im so hurt inside im like a broken plate
One that has shattered into a million pieces
One that doesn't seem like it can fixed
At night when i weep on my pillow staring
At the ceiling hoping that one day thing will get
Better hoping that one day my mom sees the good in me
And maybe not treat me like i'm different
Hoping all those memories of pain all those scars
Go away
Do u know how it feels to be let down??
Do u know how it feels to be told
Your hated
Your not wanted
I wish i never had u
Do you know how it feels to be told every day in your ears that you are gonna be disowned ?
Do u know how it feels to be a young child hoping that mommy calls u on your birthday or maybe even a holiday ?
Do u know the embarrassment of going out in public with your mom and she knows nth about u not even how to spell your name ?
And no she has not been absent out my life shes been right here but honestly she hasn't
The feeling the hurt the pain will never go away no doctor no therapy can help nth cuz there right there no matter how hard u try to bury them
I wanna run to u and hug u i wanna be special to u i want u to love me
But why do you hate me? Why did I do so wrong ??

WHY CANT U GET IM DYING INSIDE I HURTING I NEED A MOTHER NOT A HATER OR A disbaliver