Analysis of First heartache

It still feels weird not having the person with whom I share everything
Not expecting you to once again ring
It feels weird but I can still hold
I was always distance and cold
I can still go back
I still couldn't figure out what I should have but lacked  
Was my soul still cracked
Was my darkness strong enough to taint you black
Was I really meant to be alone
Was my poems only meant to describe a sad tone
I always lived as a lone
I never meant to make you sad
You were one of the few things that really made me glad
I wanted to fight for you with every ounce of strength I had
But sadly I lost
I'd have fought for you even as a ghost
I don't know where and when
You lost hope in me even so mine was never thin
You were my sun but now the light is really dim
Maybe it was really my crack
I took a small star and tainted it black