Analysis of Kids!



Kids!
Hundreds of 'em for the farmer! Kids of an imported brand;
Thousands of 'em for the country!  Lo, the man upon the land
 Bids
Loud for England's surplus youngster - five whole bob a week, 'tis said;
And their value to the nation stands at many pounds a head.
But the nation never riz 'em.
That 'would tend to Socialism';
So we have to fetch 'em over from the country where they're bred.
Kids!
Send us kids from good old Britain - sons of men who won't be slaves
From the land where countless paupers seek dishonorable graves
 Quids!
We're prepared to offer for them.  Ship them out across the deep,
From that dear old Freetrade country where the cost of labor's cheap.
While, of our unmarried workers
(Married men are costly shirkers)
We will take a meagre hundred at a pound a week and keep.
Kids?
We can't raise 'em in Australia, where employers by the score
For the bloke without a missus in the labor depôts roar
Bids.
Ship 'em out!  The noble farmer yearns to mould their bright young lives.
Ship 'em young that for a dozen years they may not seek for wives.
When they think of getting married
Maybe they'll regret they tarried
Where the kid-encumbered worker vainly for a billet strives.
Kids?
We don't want 'em when they're babies, for their raisin' costs a heap.
We don't want 'em when they're married, with their own young broods to keep.
 Skids
And brakes upon the wheels of progress are such futile folk.  Just look
At the bob advertisement.  You'll see their chance of work is 'crook.'
Ship 'em out in handy sizes
For the cove that advertises
For the unencumbered couple
' Man to milk and wife to cook.'
Kids?
Spare our days!  Why should we raise 'em? We can get 'em ready-made
From a land where there's a surplus, thanks to good old BULL's Freetrade.
Quids
It will save the careful farmer.  He can give his man the sack
Costly man who owns a missus and a child or two to whack.
Ship 'em out, he's yearnin' for 'em;
While they're young he'll just adore 'em
Then, when they grow up and marry, someone else can ship 'em back.
Ships
Pass in with cheap boy labor - 'badly needed farming hand';
Shps pass out with young Australians seeking work in other lands.
Hips
Hurrahs! are loudly sounded for the patriotic bloke
He who perpetrated this unseemly emigration joke.
Cheers for him who brings the kiddy
To a job that's sure and 'stiddy'!
It will balance the outgoing of our workless married folk.
Kids!!
Lo, we want them - want them badly!  There is none denies the fact
Kids to populate the country.  And behold, our noble act
Rids
England of her surplus toilers - we can do with quite a heap.
We can't breed them in the country - boys to plough and boys to reap.
And who says it is surprising
When we're daily advertising
For a hundred men - unmarried - at a pound a week and keep.


Scheme AbbAccdecAffAgghagAiiAjklbkAggammnopmAqbArrddrsbtsuuvbuAwwaggxxg
Poetic Form
Metre 1 101110101110101 101110101010101 1 111010101110111 011010101110101 10101011 1111100 111111101010111 1 111111101111111 101110101010001 1 101110111110101 11111101011101 111001010 1011101 11101101010101 1 111100101010101 1010101000101111 1 111010101111111 111110101111111 11111010 1010111 101010101010101 1 111111101110101 111111101111111 1 010101111110111 101010011111111 11101010 1011100 1001010 1110111 1 1101111111111101 10111010111111 1 111010101111101 101110100011111 1111111 11111011 11111010111111 1 10111101010101 111110101010101 1 111010100101 1110010100101 11111010 1011101 11100101101101 1 111111101110101 111001000110101 1 10101011111101 111100101110111 01111010 1110100 101010101010101
Closest metre Iambic pentameter
Characters 2,749
Words 521
Sentences 43
Stanzas 1
Stanza Lengths 64
Lines Amount 64
Letters per line (avg) 34
Words per line (avg) 8
Letters per stanza (avg) 2,146
Words per stanza (avg) 526
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Submitted on May 13, 2011

Modified on March 14, 2023

2:41 min read
100

Clarence Michael James Stanislaus Dennis

Clarence Michael James Stanislaus Dennis, better known as C. J. Dennis, was an Australian poet known for his humorous poems, especially "The Songs of a Sentimental Bloke", published in the early 20th century. Though Dennis's work is less well known today, his 1915 publication of The Sentimental Bloke sold 65,000 copies in its first year, and by 1917 he was the most prosperous poet in Australian history. Together with Banjo Paterson and Henry Lawson, both of whom he had collaborated with, he is often considered among Australia's three most famous poets. While attributed to Lawson by 1911, Dennis later claimed he himself was the 'laureate of the larrikin'. When he died at the age of 61, the Prime Minister of Australia Joseph Lyons suggested he was destined to be remembered as the 'Australian Robert Burns'. more…

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