Analysis of Reeeeeeeeeee

Whenever I have an opinion.
Whenever I have a thought.
All of these people think I can be bought.
No skin tags or obesity in sight.

Now that I'm over weight and think that I'm better.
I can't breathe in certain types of weather.
Stairs are my enemy and the floor my friend.
I sure hope this isn't where I meet my end.

Now that I'm standing and can see my feet.
It took longer than a day, an hour or a week.
I sweat when I see people eating.
My face looks like it took a beating.

My channel is where I project my esteem.
Or lack thereof if you know what I mean.
For now I'm going to fetch my big.
On my way to McDonald's to get a mcrib.