Analysis of Reflecting on Reflections

Standing before the bathroom mirror,
things couldn't have been clearer.
When I look at myself, I feel strange.
It's most definitely time for a change.

I step back in overwhelming shame.
I am not happy with my name.
Nor proud of some of the things I put on it,
the forcing of a haiku, free verse, or sonnet.

Is feeling this way considered obscene?
If only this mirror could turn into a screen,
then I could change what I see, shrink and erase.
Edit certain details in my flaky face.

Then I'd go and edit all of that code.
Improve the way all of it flowed,
remove each one of my past mistakes.
Like failing that class, or talking to the fakes.

I could finally improve my ability to write
and make it so I could sleep throughout the night.
So many more things I would want to revise,
even stopping the thoughts of seeing my demise.

As with most, I'm battered and bruised.
When people hear about it, they're suddenly amused.
Instead of giving a damn and being a good friend,
they 'relate' and move on, as if it's just a trend.

This may come as a shock, but these feelings are real.
People feeling this aren't just whining, it is a big deal.
The fact we're always accused of being dramatic
is something I personally find quite problematic.

That's one of the last things I'd remove,
my social skills could definitely improve.
I can't talk to people without a panic attack.
Yet I'm merely human, so perfection I'll always lack.

That doesn't mean things aren't worth a tinker,
don't fall for the trap, hook line and sinker.
You're worth a fix, it's okay to break.
Abandoning yourself is a grave mistake.