My cold water burns me

My cold water burns me.
I burn in ecstasy; I feel the pain,
wondering if I was ever sane.
Standing as the water burns my skin,
the toll on my body, the ecstasy within.

I want to leave but can't,
I want to live but I won't,
as the walls cave in, I feel condoned.

The water keeps falling, and the pain grows,
pushing and pulling, begging for more.
As the water continues to flow,
I feel the pain deep in my core.
All I could think about were the days of yore
when I could leave, fly, and soar.

The door is right there,
but if I leave, they will all stare,
as I am tangled in a fight between ecstasy and despair.
Will I slowly fall and become impaired?

As the water gets hotter,
and the steam clouds my view,
I wonder and ponder
what happened to everything of value?

And as I burn in the water of ecstasy,
I close my eyes, knowing this will continue endlessly.