Why they love me

Everyone i know knows her
Everyone i know loves her
And they like me because i love her
I’m in they worst mental state possible
But its not like i can tell anyone
No i can hear it already
“She’s literally perfect how could you”
“Of course you needed more”
“I hope you fucking kill your self
Everyone thinks I’m two months clean
But its only because they wont listen to me
All the words i speak are true
But you only hear what you choose
My arms my hips and my thighs are still bleeding and its dripping into your view
Yet you still don’t see it even though its dripping because of you
I wanna throw my phone across the room because of the anger i feel due to you
You make me look so fucking stupid
But i can get enough
Can’t you see the effect you have of me
As the blood drips to my knee
I see that even though you ignored me for nearly a week
I still care for you more then anything
And its all an illusion i know
But god how i wish it wasn’t