Depressed

It heartens me off to the wonders of all,
I was depressed, it darkens my mind.
 The pages were all around,
but I hold them like a book and took them aside.
 Lovely weather, I have just felt my vibe,
 but still in a dark light.
 Memories all around, feeling like a
 deadly devastating mind,
 I hold it and it, keeps calm but it overcomes my mind.
My inner shouted I feel like dead aside but hide it with just a smile.
 It depressed my mind, my soul feelin' like to just coming outside, it shook my heart.
I am feeling like to kill me alive,
I can't manage and I just suicide,  Hopefully that day I just called and share this with anyone so that I can live my life.