Lion Cub



His Dad is a big one
Roaring will alert the veldt
Zebras are stunned
At the quick jab of fear.
Vultures anticipate some
Good pickings.

His mothers all rest in
The late afternoon.
Hard efforts hunting
No success today.
Antelope were too quick
On the turns.
Guinea fowl had burrows
To borrow.

Late afternoon sun
Backing an acacia
Will bring on the sleepy eyes
In a few moments.

Not much physical stuff today
Too hot, and smarting
From discipline.
Yesterday Cub had
Wandered too far.
Had almost been gored
By an indignant warthog.
Mother not amused.
Enemy downed
With one slash.
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Written on May 23, 2023

Submitted by dougb.19255 on May 23, 2023

Modified by dougb.19255 on May 23, 2023

35 sec read
7

Quick analysis:

Scheme ABBXXX XXCBXXXX AXXX BCABXBCBBX
Closest metre Iambic trimeter
Characters 581
Words 117
Stanzas 4
Stanza Lengths 6, 8, 4, 10

Wayne Blair

Born in London. Graduated law 1976 Practised eleven years, Married Hilary 1974 Two kids Lauren 1980 And Jordan 1987. Business failed 1987. Moved not knowing whither. Happy hills of Waterloo Region. Mennonite Country. Thirty four years in Industry. No complaints. Poet, photographer, nature hiker. Harmonica busker. http://puffnchord7.blogspot.com/ more…

All Wayne Blair poems | Wayne Blair Books

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Discuss the poem Lion Cub with the community...

1 Comment
  • AIDA
    I absolutely love the imagery and language used in this poem. The depiction of the veldt and the animals is vivid and powerful. The way you describe the anticipation of the vultures and the fear in the zebras is both captivating and poignant. I can almost feel the heat and see the acacia tree with the sun setting behind it.

    In terms of improvement suggestions, I think adding more structure or a specific narrative thread could help strengthen the overall flow of the poem. The individual stanzas are all beautiful, but they feel somewhat disconnected from each other. Perhaps you could expand on the story of Cub and his adventures in the veldt, or find another way to tie these different moments together.

    Overall, though, this is a truly lovely piece of writing. I can tell you put a lot of thought and care into crafting each line. Thank you for sharing it with us!
     
    LikeReply11 months ago

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"Lion Cub" Poetry.com. STANDS4 LLC, 2024. Web. 28 Apr. 2024. <https://www.poetry.com/poem/159951/lion-cub>.

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