I Didn't Scream
I Didn't Scream
I didn't scream when I woke up in my bed with no memory of going home.
I didn't scream when my grandmother picked me up and knew something was wrong.
I didn't scream when she asked what was wrong and the tears started rolling down my face.
I didn't scream when we got to the hospital and I was rushed immediately to the back.
I didn't scream when the ER doctor came with the single Starr certified nurse West Jeff had at that time.
I didn't scream when they both told me they couldn't do my rape kit and I had to go to a different hospital all the way in Metairie.
I didn't scream when my grandmother told me to call my mom and dad on the way there and let them know what happened.
I didn't scream when I walked in and saw my parents had somehow made it from Hammond to Metairie in less than the time it took Granny and I to get there from Marrero.
I didn't scream when the first set of police to show up and didn't care to hear anything I had to say.
I didn't scream when the doctor and nurses invaded every orifice of my body to collect whatever evidence was left.
I didn't scream as the speculum was put in and scraped every abrasion inside that I had.
I didn't scream when the detectives came to ask their questions.
I didn't scream when the female detective insisted multiple times that it was my fault.
I didn't scream when she said I must have had a one night stand and just have a guilty conscience.
I didn't scream when I answered all of their questions 20 times each.
I didn't scream when they still didn't believe me.
I didn't scream while I asked the male detective to leave the room.
I didn't scream when I stripped naked to show that hateful woman the bruises on my body.
I didn't scream when her eyes got huge and she stopped asking questions.
I didn't scream when they told me it could be months or years before any of the evidence they collected was tested for DNA.
I didn't scream when over 18 months later the male detective called me out of the blue to say they'd found DNA evidence in my kit.
I didn't scream as I sat on the other side of the desk from the male detective who asked still more questions and had me flip through page after page of mug shots.
I didn't scream when I came back to the same guy 3 or 4 times because I knew him.
I didn't scream when the detective told me it was interesting I kept coming back to this man's picture and asked me why.
I didn't scream as I explained that he had asked me out several times years previously and I had gone on two dates with him.
I didn't scream as I told the detective this man was extremely pushy about trying to get me into bed both times.
I didn't scream as the detective acknowledged his was the DNA found on and inside my body.
I didn't scream when the detective told me I couldn't press charges.
I didn't scream when I was told that this man who did these awful repugnant things to me was dead.
I didn't scream when they explained how he died and that I felt like it wasn't awful enough.
I didn't scream when I walked out of that building back into the late afternoon sunlight more tears streaming down my face.
I didn't scream when I had no outlet or chance for justice.
I didn't scream.
About this poem
Thoughts from a rape survivor.
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Written on May 13, 2023
Submitted by jleonard1010 on May 13, 2023
Modified by jleonard1010 on May 13, 2023
- 3:38 min read
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Quick analysis:
Scheme | A x x b x x c x x d x x e x x x c x c e d x x f x f x c x x x b x A |
---|---|
Characters | 3,252 |
Words | 685 |
Stanzas | 34 |
Stanza Lengths | 1, 1, 1, 1, 1, 1, 1, 1, 1, 1, 1, 1, 1, 1, 1, 1, 1, 1, 1, 1, 1, 1, 1, 1, 1, 1, 1, 1, 1, 1, 1, 1, 1, 1 |
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"I Didn't Scream" Poetry.com. STANDS4 LLC, 2024. Web. 13 May 2024. <https://www.poetry.com/poem/159299/i-didn't-scream>.
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