The Inch Between Us

The Inch Between Us – Poem


I put my hand up
You put your hand up
That inch
Of glass
That inch
Between us

Do you remember
Can you remember
When you heard my heart
From the inside
Beating you into existence
Thumping you into life

Hockey player
Check
Skier
Check
Snowboarder
Check
Paintball expert
Check
Genius
Check
…Meth Addict
…Check

Exhausted, beat down
You looked
Not like you
Not like my son
Not like the brother
The brother he needs
Not like that father
The father she needs

You looked
Through me
Around me
At me
But not really
Glaring
Mad as a Hatter
Crazy
Methed-out
Drugs
Fucking hate, them

Really. Fucking. Hate. Those. Drugs.
Addiction fueled you
Addiction took you
Addiction cheated you
Cheated me
Cheated those you loved
Who loved you
Broke … our … hearts
Really. Hate. Addiction.

I was numb
I was a mother
I am your mother
I was in disbelief
I wanted to vomit
I wanted to scream
I needed to rewind
Rewind the clock
Rewind our life
Only an inch
So very close
But not
Not really

They say you did that
They say you did
They say you
They say
They
Them

With their uniforms
With their guns
With their judgements
With their paperwork
With their cells
With their law
With their proof

“I am the mother!”
I wanted to scream
“I am the mother!”
This fucking bad dream
“I am his mother!”
Fucking unreal
“I am your mother!”
Years behind bars
What will you …
Can you …
… reveal?

On the other side of that glass
You pulled and picked
You paced and swayed
You tried to be you
But the drug
That fucking drug
Still had its way
With you
Around you
In You

You spit and twirl
You grasped and gasped
Then
That moment came
Your focus returned
Split second
Then you sat
In front of me
And looked
Back to me
Back at me
Back with me
Eyes black no more
Hearts open

I put my hand up
You put your hand up
The glass
That inch
So much heat and energy and love and heartache
Between that inch
Of glass
Between us