I can't feel

She so desperately wanted to feel the emotion she once felt.
The giddy haze she felt at the end of the day,
To the morning air that made the happiness float away.
The saddened heart that ached so loud,
She missed the feeling of being swallowed by a scary crowd.
It hurt to hear because it made her skin sheer,
But that’s what made it sincere.
The idea of fear,
Became a full-time career.
Anxiety like her gut was on a guillotine,
Even though her mind stayed pristine.
It hurts to feel fine,
Even though she couldn’t deal with the decline.
It became hard to pretend,
Even though she tried her best to comprehend.
She couldn’t feel,
Never, not even in the end.