There Is Still So Much To Hold On To

Japanese beetles devour the figs on our backyard fig tree
Their bodies compact, metallic, and green as emeralds
Though they cannot harm me
Two or three attack each time I approach
Certain their buzzing ferocity
Will scare away the strange predator
I try to kill them by drowning them
In a prolonged spray of soapy water
As they cluster on the ripening fruit
But few succumb
I grow weary of this battle and give in
The figs are doomed

Night walk with my dog
Rainfall breaks the turquoise gleam
Of the illuminated swimming pool
Ten thousand shards dance in the downpour
A shattered reflection of clubhouse windows
And patio lounge chairs
The rhythmic chirring of insects echoes in the trees
The dog starts to chase a rabbit I can’t even see
But the leash won’t let her
And I won’t let go of the leash
The rabbit is safe

Vanity lights burn brightly above the bathroom mirror
Revealing every wrinkle etched in my face
Every follicle of my thinning, greying hair
No signs of skin cancer on my face, a huge relief
But hard floors hurt my feet and my muscles ache
More than they ever used to
Out paddleboarding on the calm lagoon yesterday
I saw the sky below me and felt like I was flying
Life surged through me and gave me indescribable joy
There is still so much to hold on to
I’ve lived in places where retirement
Means waiting around to die
All of us, of course, are dying slowly
Still, I’m determined not to live in fear
And am in no hurry to meet death
I count every breath as an expression of gratitude
We may all be doomed
But I, for one, am not ready to surrender