Waiting

I sit in silence consumed by the darkness, awaiting test results that are keeping me up at night. I stare at my coffee cup that is giving me solace as I slowly sip the brown elixir. Inhaling the alluring aroma that is sustaining my ailing mind at the moment. I’m trying my best to ignore the Indians dancing in my head, telling me to give into my hopelessness. Telling me that my time is coming to an end. That cancer has come knocking on my door once again. Like an old friend come to take me away on a far away trip. But cancer is not my friend. It is a monster with a creepy grin waiting for it’s next victim. I push these thoughts to the back of my mind and continue to stare into space. As my mind continues to race, a single tear falls slowly from my face into my coffee. Then another and another. Until my eyes are like an overflowing fountain of complete and utter despair. I don’t even try to stop the tears as I grasp my coffee cup for dear life. I sit this way for what feels like an eternity, until I see the light creeping from outside. Not much longer before I get the call from the Dr. So I continue to wait in silence hoping for good news. It has to be good news.