Mistakes

Mistakes that I have made,
haunt me still today.
In the night as I lay awake,
thoughts stream of how I will still pay.
As I remennisce of the what-would-haves, and used-to-be's,
I wonder where I would be today,
had I not chose the choice I could not clearly see.
Would I be smarter, more care free, less emotionally insecure?
Or have I learned something that i needed to,
and just dont know if thats for sure?