jchym_p
  Bronze Member

I think you should try a different approach to art. Because I feel that the quality of the meaning behind the words far outweights the quality of the words themselves. I think you should try something where you play more with words and metaphors and all the toys and tricks that you can use to make a poem sound more interesting. As that would help elevate the poem.
You actually used it: They speak not to question, but to cage,
more of this please. more »

I ain't reading all that.
On a serious note: I enjoyed it.

Good

I don't quite understand why do you repeat the first line at the end. Can someone pls explain?