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Thoughts of a job-seeking rambler

O my mirror self what to do?

O my dark shadow what to do?

Days in this city

With me out in search of work

Nights in this city seeking

Jobs that were published in ads

O my mirror self what to do?

O my sad heart what to do?

No, this is not my own city

No, this is not even my town

Yet I keep haunting the streets

Yet I keep counting heartbeats

O my woe, tell me what to do?

O my despair what should I do?

Neon lights all around my being

As the sun goes down slowly dying

Strange sounds encircle all my being

As the day grows dark and frightening

O my sinking hope what to do?

O my struggling, what to do?

Spread overhead is a network of stars

Like a pilgrim's pageant, like a lover's dream

But who will fathom the apathy that screams

Inside my tired body like a banshee unseen?

O my reflection what to do?

O my taxed nerves what to do?

Suddenly the gaze sees a falling star

Like fireworks on display near and afar

And a sneaking whisperer hisses and asks

Whose ill-fated days will this sign mar?

O my grief tell me what to do?

O my unfed stomach now what to do?

The night breeze jeers urging me to the bar

Saying if that is not possible then not very far

Is a place where some lonely damsels wait

For young men who can't quieten their hearts.

O my mocking 'me', what to do?

O my futility, what to do?

At another road-bend are the young and carefree

Men and women rejoicing in glee

And also some insults shouted loud and clear,

Some obscene display of modern-day cheer...

O my image what to do?

O my shadow what to do?

I do not stop to pause on my way

Nor is it in my nature to turn away

And it doesn't look any soul is there

Who, with me, my feelings will share...

O my poverty, what to do?

O my brevity, what to do?

Even now some damsels are waiting for me

Even now some bored women are longing for me

But binding on me are my vows and my pledge

And defiantly staring is my conscience at me...

O my loneliness, what to do?

O my beloved, what to do?

Then a thought tells me to break all the vows

And to give up hopes of the one that I love

And a frenzy grips me to cut life's frail chord

And break my promises like a professional fraud...

O my apathy, what to do?

O flickering candle, what to do?

A flame surges within my heart and becomes a blaze

I am close to spilling over my angst in my maze

The wounds eating me deep inside also chase

And want to devour my honourable ways...

O you poet, tell me what to do?

O you deep one, tell me what to do?

Slowly the dim light of a villa reveals a form

And I see a veiled woman walking out, forlorn

Disguised like a cleric, she is hiding her all

The youth of a widow, in a phantom-like shawl

O my image what to do?

O my shadow what to do?

In this state I also see some men

Who like Nero and Pharaoh scoff in vein

They are the ones who occupy high posts

And keep the efforts of those like me in vain...

O my anger, tell me what to do?

O my frustration, tell me what to do?

This prolonged misery of mine, this deathly way of life

Often hearkens me to get out and start civil strife

Against those in power doing nothing for us guys,

Except wasting our days and nights with their lies...

O my image what to do?

O my shadow what to do?

Looking up I feel like tearing the sky

And stuffing into a black hole the stars shining high

My search unending for some honest work to do

Is driving me to recklessness, even then I sigh

O my image what to do?

O my shadow what to do?

I may become a spokesman of the jobless and let loose hell

Just like mighty Samson, like brave William Tell

Maybe then the things will improve -- I can't tell

But once I become ruthless the high-ups will yell...

O my image what to do?

O my shadow what to do?

There is no response to the thoughts that I have

There is nobody to be seen around, like me, aware

Of societal hollowness and the hungry ones' glare

What must I do now, be here or nowhere?

O my true self, what to do?

O my soul's voice, what to do?

  *********

There's a robber on the throne of the citadels of power

Who is describing himself a leader of the poor

If nothing else, then my failure to find work

Will compel me to destroy all that he holds dear.

I am cornered and there's nothing else I can do

Except hit back at will...that's the best I can do.

I must get up and come out

Against injustice, oppression and rout

The despots killing us, day in, day out.
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Submitted on October 09, 2013

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Muhammad Naveed Ahmed Claim this poet

PLEASE NOTE THAT I OWN THE COPY RIGHTS OF ALL MY POEMS PUBLISHED HERE.AUTHOR, AWARD WINNING INTERNATIONAL POET, RESEARCHER AND JOURNALIST, Muhammad Naveed Ahmed (Emmenay) was born on the 16th of December. He is the first of six children born to Muzaffar Ahmed and Fatima Qudsia Ahmed. He got his early education at two different schools in Rawalpindi notably the P.A.F. Model School, Chaklala, which is now known as the P.A.F. College, Chaklala. He passed his matriculation exams from the school with a slot among the top three positions. He was declared as the 'Best Student' of the school as well as the 'Best Debator' and the 'Best Speaker'(English and Urdu). He was also in the school's hockey, cricket and judo teams; and Secretary of the P.A.F. Amateur Drama Society. Muhammad NAVEED Ahmed passed his F.Sc. and B.A. exams from the distinguished F.G. Sir Syed College, Rawalpindi and then got his Masters degree in English Literature from the University of Punjab in Lahore, Pakistan -- securing First Divisions in all. He won the All Pakistan Quaid-e-Azam Centenary Celebrations Speech Contest with an extempore speech "The Quaid As I See Him" in 1976. He then sat for the tough Central Superior Services (CSS)Competitive Examination of the Federal Public Service Commission, Islamabad and passed the written, psychological tests and final interview and passed with an aggregate of 75 per cent marks. He has worked in almost all the major English language newspapers of Pakistan starting with 'The Muslim' in 1982. He also worked in 'Dawn' and 'The News International' holding senior editorial positions in both. He has been writing editorials, articles, short stories, poems and features from 1980 onwards on topics ranging from national politics and international affairs to sports, films and culture. He has also written film, drama and book reviews for 'The Nation', 'The Muslim', 'The Frontier Post', 'Dawn' and 'The News International'. He has also worked in the 'Gulf News' newspaper and the 'Gulf Weekly' in Dubai, United Arab Emirates. He also edited the first 'Dubai Airshow' journal at the time of the first airshow in 1993. When contacted by well known journalist and politician Mushahid Hussain Sayed in the 1990s and offered a job as Senior Research Fellow in the Islamabad Policy Research Institute, Naveed opted to join the government's psy-warfare campaign aimed at supporting the freedom struggle of the Kashmiris in the occupied Indian territory. He spoke and wrote on the Kashmir issue at the Stimson Center's South Asia Internet Forum (SAIF), the Brookings Institution, the Asia Study Circle and the Dale Carnegie Institute for Peace, USA, during his stint as Senior Research Fellow affiliated with the Pakistan government's Ministry of Information in Islamabad. He also worked with well known social worker and gifted orator, Javed Jabbar, when he replaced Mushahid Hussain as the federal information minister in 1999-2000. Naveed is mostly known for his poems in English, his horror/detective short stories and his column "The Hindu-Jewish Conspiracy" published in 'The News International' in 2002. Naveed is the author of two books. One is a selected compilation of his poems titled "Unheard Melodies". The other is a informative research-oriented book: "Kashmir the Vailing Valley." Both the books were published from Islamabad, Pakistan, in 1999. The International Library of Poetry based in Maryland, Baltimore (USA), has published his poems in all its anthologies starting from 1997. His poems have also been brought out in the audio-CD format by the International Library of Poetry. He has been invited by the ILP to officiate as judge in the Annual Poetry Bash at New York's Radio City Hall starting 2000 onwards. He is featured in the International Poetry Hall of Fame of Maryland, Baltimore (USA). Naveed (Whose name is also spelt as NAVID) has collaborated in several haiku competitions with acclaimed U.S. poetess Deborah Russell and poet Michael Rehling since 2001. He is also a member of another well known American poet Michael Rehling's Haikuhut (www.haikuhut.com) and the Ameen Rihani International Foundation (USA). Naveed had a personal rapport with the well-known Pakistani poetess Parveen Shakir during and after his training at the Civil Services Academy in Lahore. He was also a long-distance friend of the late English poet Daud Kamal of Peshawar. Naveed firmly believes in human values, virtues, tolerance, friendship, love and the mystical significance of religion in leading an upright life. His poetry and prose reflect his approach on life and living. The poet's role model is Prophet Muhammad (Peace be upon him). He also holds in high regard, the fourth Caliph of Islam, known as Ali bin Abu Talib along with Abu Bakr, Omar bin Khattab, Usman (Ali's predecessors in the era of the first caliphate rule of Islam. He also admires Fatima (Prophet Muhammad's (PBUH) daughter and her two sons, Hasan and Hussain, especially Hussain, who was marty more…

All Muhammad Naveed Ahmed poems | Muhammad Naveed Ahmed Books

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    "Thoughts of a job-seeking rambler" Poetry.com. STANDS4 LLC, 2021. Web. 31 Jul 2021. <https://www.poetry.com/poem/88701/thoughts-of-a-job-seeking-rambler>.

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