Road through hell to heaven

There was a day i felt proud of myself
 and there i felt a light of everlasting joy
 all a dream, all a dream, all a dream
and then came a day to prove what i am
 i tried d*mn hard, went too far
 yet i failed , yet i failed, yet i failed
the same test i had to face once more
 without an effort i passed and then
 it didn't matter at all
i cursed the god why me, why me
 but now i see myself on an edge of a road
 passing right through hell to the door of heaven
 this heaven of mine is just for me
 may be its just me who takes it as heaven
for somebody else it might be just another door
 yet it is in my world, and my heaven
 so i strive for it, i fight for it
similar is the hell of mine
 some may think of it just the way it is
 and treat is as just a usual thing
 some may take it as optional
 but to me it is the hell of my world
full of fire, spikes and every painful thing possible
 still on this road are flower just
 like ones in a cactus right in between the spikes
 full of unseen beauty and giving a great relief inside
 this road through the hell of my world
and hereby i vow to myself
 till i have anything left in me i will move
 always towards my heaven
 no matter how hard it gets and how disappointed i may feel
 on my progress through this path
but to reach that everlasting joy i have to get in my heaven
 let me cheer up for this rebirth of mine from now
 and here goes my first step on this road in hell.