Guilty Dreamer

Please forgive the blatent stare
I'm just so plainly unaware
of the world beyond my vacant view;
my mind is teathered by weighted chains to the most intoxicating fantasy.
Though its said that love is dreamless
here I stand sewn so seamless
into this idea of happiness
that was once so hard to feel.
Ageless, timeless, yet ever feeding on the men I used to be,
will you be the one to stop the misery?

No, not you.
The look in your eyes is lifeless
and your smile laughs like a bitter joke.
That voice of yours, so sweet, plays sharply in my ears,
pushing along the same old fears
that I'll wake up and hate who you are.
As its always been, memory drags me clawing back into the void of the hopeful loveless.
I dared to try for you, so please don't think me careless
for baring the guilt that I couldn't be good enough for you.