Downfall Dreaming* ~

There are things
I cannot clearly think of,
let alone speak...
For once,
my silence echoes greater volumes...

In my head,
my crazy world--
Whirlwinds and
Uprooting tornadoes...

In my head,
I hammer the gavel in favor of
right against wrong...
Then dismiss myself to
wrestle with the
Devil at each
repressed recess...

It's inner torture--
Outward editing--
Praying...
Praying...
Praying...
For clarity, guidance and determination
to survive these fits of darkness...

Here is what I am,
and am not...
Here is what I do
and refuse...

Crowned in love's roses and thorns...
Missing her and them and you...

I adorn each day with
theatrical disturbance...
Biting butterfly wings--
Kissing blades that
wound me religiously...

I've weakened in the forefronts of battle,
and now I grow savage in its memory...
I expect so much from my heart...
it expects so much of me!

Why am I tortured so?
In agony,
I delay the burial of my former ways...
In agony,
the guilt of my human, Eve nature
strangles and starves my
clipped-wing
Soul...