Blue Slaughter

There was a boat on the water,
 Noble maiden on a voyage;
Sailing across oceans of blue slaughter,
  Logical whaling sabotage!

Oh Maria, how far you've come,
  Singing the song of the sea.
By and large you are mighty glum,
  When telling fables for a fee.

On a boat that's grand and old,
  I'm proud to say she is so.
Captain Patrick was oddly feeling cold,
  When a parrot spoke crow.

Scratching his back he was pale,
  But the sun made him better.
I saw that Patrick drinking something stale,
  Down he went getting wetter.

I offered him raw coconut juice,
  And so up he jumped again.
The boat was once more cruising loose,
  Captained by a man insane.

On darkest waters we sailed far,
  Chasing whalers on a whim.
There we were following the North Star,
  Gallantly going out on a limb.

With rifles at the ready we went,
  Pursuing those darn whalers.
But all we found was a ship from Kent,
  With not a sign of the sailor's!

''A ghost ship, a bally ghost ship!'',
  Captain Patrick sternly said.
His parrot squawked, ''Polly corn chip,
  Feed Polly corn chip spread''.

Dumb parrot I thought, too daft,
  Then was a vile stirring felt.
It was coming through the airshaft,
  My spirit suddenly did melt.

And hell swarmed the frosty air,
  Patrick ran but was slain.
Something severed his head there,
  Such horror it would stain.   

On a boat called Maria this day,
  Parrot and I were left to die.
But a whale appeared out of the grey,
  Thence it was a sight to spy.