Affable Alf



Have you heard the inscrutable mutable Alf,
The mannerly man with the silvery tongue?
Ever loquacious,
Smiling and gracious.
Loud in the land have his praises been sung.
He has magnetised all with his eloquent speakin'
The Great oratorical oracle, Deakin.

His somewhat sporadical radical speeches
Have over-persuaded us all, and his style
His easy urbanity
Tickles our vanity;
And we are won by his affable smile.
He captivates all with his eloquence sinister,
Does the persuasive, evasive Prime Minister.

His fine pyrotechnical technical phrases,
His grand perorations, exordiums, too,
 'Spite their obscurity,
 Are of a purity
And of a quality equalled by few,
And he knows all the tricks of portfol-i-o seekin',
That clever illusionist, fusionist Deakin.

But, beware of mysterious serious Alf.
His weird cabalistical, mystical call
His impetuosity,
Plus his verbosity,
Acts like a strange anaesthetic on all.
But, when you get over the charm of his speakin',
You'll come to a frangible, tangible Deakin.

You'll find an accessible cessible man,
With political frailties many as most o' them.
'Spite his euphonical
Gifts histrionical,
Critics political point, to a host o' them.
He is but a man after all and a weak 'un
A most, inexcusable fusible Deakin.

His most omnifarious various views
He'll alter to suit the occasion that pays him,
Though lacking in clarity.
Any disparity
In his fused following's powerless to daze him.
Regarded apart from his eloquent speakin',
O, what a lamentable, rentable Deakin!

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Submitted on May 13, 2011

Modified on March 05, 2023

1:14 min read
52

Quick analysis:

Scheme ABCCBDD EFGGFHH EGGGXDD AIGGIDD DJFFJDD XKGGKDD
Closest metre Iambic pentameter
Characters 1,481
Words 243
Stanzas 6
Stanza Lengths 7, 7, 7, 7, 7, 7

Clarence Michael James Stanislaus Dennis

Clarence Michael James Stanislaus Dennis, better known as C. J. Dennis, was an Australian poet known for his humorous poems, especially "The Songs of a Sentimental Bloke", published in the early 20th century. Though Dennis's work is less well known today, his 1915 publication of The Sentimental Bloke sold 65,000 copies in its first year, and by 1917 he was the most prosperous poet in Australian history. Together with Banjo Paterson and Henry Lawson, both of whom he had collaborated with, he is often considered among Australia's three most famous poets. While attributed to Lawson by 1911, Dennis later claimed he himself was the 'laureate of the larrikin'. When he died at the age of 61, the Prime Minister of Australia Joseph Lyons suggested he was destined to be remembered as the 'Australian Robert Burns'. more…

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