Cold rejection

I lay there in our cold bed shivering
as I haven't felt an embrace at all through the night yet I've held you until your eyes sweetly closed and your breathing gets deeper as you slip into a beautiful slumber, your back to me, my shivering body facing you ....the Big Spoon I am, I drift to sleep still cold.
7am rolls around and my eyes fling open as my body aches from the cold rememberthe love once showed,
I whisper sweetly and softly "Baby can you hold me.." you then suck your teeth and sigh as if you were asked to do the most dreaded thing ever ...it's alright,
I breath quietly as this feeling comes over me like the coldness from the room that has held me through the night,
 I caress your leg as if saying it's ok, as I feel my heart strings tighten still not snapping,
Craving the way you once touched me... loved me ....anything,
 This pain adds to the ache of my cold shivering body feeling non-existant,
Sharp pains pierce my palms, tears stream from my eyes dampening my face and pillow you slip back to slip in an instant.
Rejection even in the smallest form from you feels like death,
 I dare not wake you for fear of your reaction
And wrath,
.... I love you with all that I am,
 I accept this feeling after all you're loved and I don't want to cause you pain....