Music of Love and Longing



Music of Love and Longing


I can't tell you how I smile. To every thing I write a song.

Maybe in the balance I'll cry the less when I miss you.

To bring a lifting note to my ever-brooding heart.

When you talk softly to me
through the currents in the air,
tell me why a bluesman lulls,
when his song's of darkness
with no rests.

Sing to soothe my heart once more.

Tell me that you love me.

Better love to show me.

I'll be asleep soon,
come whisper pulses to me quietly while I'm dreaming.

I'll know you are singing to me as I compose myself
to the rhythm of your cradling heart beats.
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Written on January 18, 2025

Submitted by mark.e.s on January 18, 2025

Modified by mark.e.s on January 20, 2025

41 sec read
225

Quick analysis:

Scheme AX X X BXXXX X B B XX XXA
Closest metre Iambic tetrameter
Characters 590
Words 133
Stanzas 9
Stanza Lengths 2, 1, 1, 5, 1, 1, 1, 2, 3

Discuss the poem Music of Love and Longing with the community...

3 Comments
  • AIDA
    What a beautifully heartfelt poem you've created with "Music of Love and Longing"! Your ability to convey deep emotions through vivid imagery and expressive language is truly commendable. The way you intertwine music and love creates a harmonious blend that resonates with readers, evoking a sense of both longing and comfort. Phrases like "whisper pulses" and "rhythm of your cradling heart beats" are particularly striking, as they paint an intimate picture of connection and affection.

    Your theme of finding solace in music and love is powerful and relatable, making it easy for readers to connect with your sentiments. The rhythm and flow of the poem work well to reflect the emotional highs and lows you express, enhancing the overall impact. I also appreciate how you pose questions, inviting the reader into a dialogue and creating a sense of vulnerability—this adds an engaging layer to your poem.

    Improvement Suggestions:

    1. Structure and Punctuation:
    Consider refining the structure by adding some punctuation to enhance the flow and clarity of your thoughts. For instance, breaking up longer lines or adding commas could help convey your emotions more effectively.

    2. Imagery and Metaphors:
    While you have some excellent imagery, further exploration of metaphors could deepen the poem’s emotional resonance. Perhaps you could compare the act of singing to a specific memory or feeling—this would create even stronger connections for the readers.

    3. Variability in Line Length:
    Playing with line lengths more deliberately can add a dynamic quality to your poem. Shorter lines could convey urgency or longing, while longer lines might suggest comfort and warmth.

    4. Ending Impact:
    The conclusion is soft and gentle, which works well. However, you might consider a more definitive closing line or image to leave the reader with a lasting impression of resolution or hope.

    Overall, this poem is a wonderful expression of love and the healing power of music. With just a few tweaks, it can shine even brighter. Keep writing; your voice is compelling and filled with potential!
     
    LikeReply 117 days ago
  • Inactiveuser
    Heavily and richly poetic. The imagery and words are beautiful
    LikeReply 229 days ago
  • ladyygracious
    Nice one
    LikeReply 229 days ago

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"Music of Love and Longing" Poetry.com. STANDS4 LLC, 2025. Web. 19 Feb. 2025. <https://www.poetry.com/poem/210289/music-of-love-and-longing>.

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