I Deserve A Better Farewell

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https://www.poetry.com/poem/154457/hope

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  Symmetry58

  Hello, it's me again, Mr. Verbose. LoL Ya killin me here, buddy. These gorgeous, sentimental pieces are drawing me back to myself and former life. I was him yet again. I recall a former beauty queen, Miss New Hampshire, I had dated early 80s. Lynda Poulin was her name. I was so rotten then. My friend Norm and I were camping at Sebago Lake in Maine like we had every year for 6 years running. Lynda insisted on tagging along MUCH to Norm's chagrin. A couple days in he insisted she leave and go home, to which I agreed. I told her to please go home because this was Norm's and my annual guy getaway. Reluctantly she drove away. I immediately seized the opportunity, like I always had, to mess around with one of the beauties at the lake. Angie her name was, from Fitchburg Mass.
  
  Well, a couple days later as Norm and I sat on the beach talking about our escapades, who comes trouncing across the sand straight at me but Lynda. Eyes rolled, and with great exasperation, I met her head on.
  
  Her first words - "I had a dream you cheated on me." My first deflection - "You dreamed I cheated on you with Bev from Canada didn't you?" Her response - "Yes, I did." My deceit - "I swear I did not cheat on you with Bev." Bev was another young regular at the lake I had messed around with, along with others, over the years. Thankfully, and much to my now belated chagrin, Lynda bought the BS thinking I had, in fact, not cheated at all.
  
  I recall that night being very drunk and mean to Lynda and her crying hard telling me "All I want to do is make you happy." How hard that hit me and how hard I wept I cannot begin to tell you. It's been 40 years now and that night and her pain still haunt the cruelness of my former nature. Do you know that about 6 or 7 years ago Linda actually went out of her way to find me on Facebook so as to friend me??? One of the first things I did was to apologize for how rotten I had been to her decades prior. She couldn't even remember it had been so long...BUT I remembered and remembered HARD. Again I ramble, but this is what these poems do to and for me. They assure me to never be that person again because at the end of every selfish lashing is a soul worthy of love and respect. Thank you for helping me remember that fact, Charmane. more »

  LikeReply1 year ago