Rate:0.0 / 0 votes

EVENING OUT

Hubbs

Forgetting is not to forgive
It is pain that is held within
unless your mind is a sieve
Icicles hold on eaves melting

Early morn you break fast
Chased after noon to toil
At night it dawns you last
Dream suite no wages foil

No sweet dream amid night
Dusk to dust scurrying about
Time's hard not a day light
Hoping things are evening out
Font size:
Collection  PDF     
 

Submitted by Hubbsify on January 27, 2023

Modified on March 25, 2023

21 sec read
5

Quick analysis:

Scheme AXAX BCBC DEDE
Closest metre Iambic trimeter
Characters 339
Words 69
Stanzas 3
Stanza Lengths 4, 4, 4
Full analysis for EVENING OUT »

Hubbs

I am looking beyond written 'histories' for truths that are intentionally disguised within words by way of using modern terms more…

All Hubbs poems | Hubbs Books

7 fans

Discuss the poem EVENING OUT with the community...

1 Comment
  • AIDA
    AIDA
    Great job on this poem! I really appreciate the captivating imagery and the message behind it. Your use of metaphors, particularly with the icicles holding on eaves melting, and the idea of time being hard and not a day light, really helps to bring your words to life.

    If I could offer one suggestion for improvement, it may be to work on the flow of the poem a bit more. Some of the lines feel a bit choppy and could benefit from a smoother rhythm. However, this is a small detail and overall, I think you've done a wonderful job of conveying a message about the importance of forgiveness and the damage that holding onto pain can cause.

    Keep up the great work!     
    LikeReply1 year ago

Translation

Find a translation for this poem in other languages:

Select another language:

  • - Select -
  • 简体中文 (Chinese - Simplified)
  • 繁體中文 (Chinese - Traditional)
  • Español (Spanish)
  • Esperanto (Esperanto)
  • 日本語 (Japanese)
  • Português (Portuguese)
  • Deutsch (German)
  • العربية (Arabic)
  • Français (French)
  • Русский (Russian)
  • ಕನ್ನಡ (Kannada)
  • 한국어 (Korean)
  • עברית (Hebrew)
  • Gaeilge (Irish)
  • Українська (Ukrainian)
  • اردو (Urdu)
  • Magyar (Hungarian)
  • मानक हिन्दी (Hindi)
  • Indonesia (Indonesian)
  • Italiano (Italian)
  • தமிழ் (Tamil)
  • Türkçe (Turkish)
  • తెలుగు (Telugu)
  • ภาษาไทย (Thai)
  • Tiếng Việt (Vietnamese)
  • Čeština (Czech)
  • Polski (Polish)
  • Bahasa Indonesia (Indonesian)
  • Românește (Romanian)
  • Nederlands (Dutch)
  • Ελληνικά (Greek)
  • Latinum (Latin)
  • Svenska (Swedish)
  • Dansk (Danish)
  • Suomi (Finnish)
  • فارسی (Persian)
  • ייִדיש (Yiddish)
  • հայերեն (Armenian)
  • Norsk (Norwegian)
  • English (English)

Citation

Use the citation below to add this poem to your bibliography:

Style:MLAChicagoAPA

"EVENING OUT" Poetry.com. STANDS4 LLC, 2024. Web. 24 Apr. 2024. <https://www.poetry.com/poem/149367/evening-out>.

Powered by CITE.ME Cite.Me

Become a member!

Join our community of poets and poetry lovers to share your work and offer feedback and encouragement to writers all over the world!

More poems by

Hubbs

»

April 2024

Poetry Contest

Join our monthly contest for an opportunity to win cash prizes and attain global acclaim for your talent.
6
days
1
hour
59
minutes
102 entries submitted — 48 remaining

Special Program

Earn Rewards!

Unlock exciting rewards such as a free mug and free contest pass by commenting on fellow members' poems today!

Our awesome collection of

Promoted Poems

»

Browse Poetry.com

#ABCDEFGHIJKLMNOPQRSTUVWXYZ

Quiz

Are you a poetry master?

»
"I celebrate myself, and sing myself."
A Billy Collins
B Walt Whitman
C Countee Cullen
D William Wordsworth