San Francisco Swings My Moods

Adrenaline is my companion.
His highlights reflect laughter onto me,
His demanding presence intoxicating,
Joyful, he is all thrill and spectacle,
And everyone admires us together-

He helps me shine,
So I chase him till I cannot stand any longer.
Adrenaline and I wander
And skip through luxurious back alley’s,
The bay area tastes like a candy shop today,
And the skyscrapers become bouncy houses.

As I pick at a hangnail that is so close
To breaking the skin on my hands-
Cracked from the salty air like
Down-on-their-luck addicts pushing shopping carts
In front of the Chanel store,
Adrenaline holds me closer,
Singing starlight in my ringing ears,
Without ever moving his lips.

We fly through Union Square:
An unblinking blur of black puffer jackets,
I try not to focus on the reality of time,
How the lights in his speckled eyes
Will leave me eventually,
And I’ll find Calmness,
While he’ll find Calamity.

I sit in a coffeeshop but don’t realize he’s gone
Until a cold hand rests on mine as I reach
For my notebook,
The tears making Jackson Pollock designs
On my white napkin.

I’m in a sort-of mopey fashion,
Then a new companion
I’ll see.
Darkness,
As if the negative space around a waning crescent moon
Found its foothold on a man’s soft face,

Melancholy is my companion,
And his icy hand clutches my waist,
As we slither through tunnels of Chinese food,
Pigeons, long-abandoned construction work,
Sifting through the light
Until we find purple shade benches,
And artwork displayed on the stillness of parked busses.

Melancholy is my companion,
The bay area smells like a crematorium today,
We carry the fragrance of decomposing dreams.
Averted eyes are our greeting,
We are full of danger and furrowed brows,
No teeth to admire,
No stars in our eyes,
Us together,
Means pursed lips and hunched spines.

Our duo slides by dog walkers
Unannounced and leaving without a goodbye,
We stare at the tall darkness of the looming city
As if we were prepared for it to consume us,
Just take everything.

But as soon as window shopping
And crunching leaves
Loses it’s dulling medicinal effects,
My moods swing faster than stock prices,
Priorities shift like cancellations at a three-star restaurants,
And the spins leave me inebriated with confusion.

The hum of my loves echoes through
The city of dead doves.
If I stand still long enough,
A new feeling will greet me,
If I’m being honest with myself,
I need these moods to complete me.