IT IS THAT TIME OF YEAR AGAIN THE TIME I HATE THE MOST

It is that time of year again the time that I hate the most I try so fucking hard to keep the thought out of my head all my loved ones are dying or are ready dead hell I was almost a ghost my damn self so I can only imagine the tears that  would have brought it is that time of year again when I go outside in a blizzard hoping to catch snowflakes on my tongue like we use to do when we were children building snowmen go sleigh riding in the backyard and I was always crashing into the same damn tree but you were my big brother you would pick me up and carry me inside telling mom it is that time of year and dumbass did it again why don't want just cut down that stupid tree

It is almost Christmas time and right about now you NaNa and PAPa are on my mind and I am just thinking about our childhood and if you were still alive would our children be playing would they have finally cut down that tree so we all could go for a ride without me knocking myself out because I know it was you always pushing me down the hill screaming Hey dumbass look out for the tree