Unspoken Truth

Funny how no one understands you, or what you go through.
It is difficult to explain, you cannot understand what I am feeling.
Trusting people is difficult!
Opening up is difficult! lesson learnt
My mind is going in circles;
It's like I'm going crazy.

Yes, I'm a child, a teenager to be precise.
I struggle with things, too.
Not the bills or the fees; but my health; mental health.
You skip the points and jump to conclusions when I speak.
You never really understood what I said.
A lot of questions are left unanswered;
No one to answer them.

You ask me to open up; I laugh in self-mockery.
I'm dying, but I smile to make others happy.
I'm smiling, but am I really happy?
You don't see my pain but you judge me .
You don't know how I feel.
I have struggled in different areas, but do you notice? No!
You are blinded by your words, your beliefs, and what you think is right.

Finally, I have accepted the way I am, but your words kill me.
I don't want to die, but suicide seems like the best option.
I guess I would say hi to the devil...
Yes, you are older, wiser and all...
So, I believe you should understand me, my behaviour, my thinking,
Sadly, you don't !

Open up! That's never going to happen!
I risk my mental health each time you speak and I don't respond.
It's like I'm being silenced with your words that have a great effect on my mind
Overthinking, anxiety, ADHD, OCD, and depression are not something you understand, because you haven't dealt with it
I'm struggling every day!
It's difficult to explain.
I'm dealing with things too, so, please understand.