Worse

I don't know what's worse
The fact that I'm without parents or the struggle that I have to face due to their absence

I don't know what's worse between
Making choices which have consequences and having to to carry that trauma that comes with those consequences

I don't know what's worse between
Having to say I'm alright and tears blurring out my vision because I'm not alright

I don't know what's worse between
Fearing men and fearing men because of one man

I don't know whats worse between
The scenarios I create in my head as men latch on to me and the flashbacks I have of him latching onto me

I still smell his scent you know, it's the kinda scent that makes you wanna vomit

I don't know what's worse between being neglected by your own family at a time of need or neglected by friends

I don't know what's worse and that's a fact because more is to unrevel in my cruel, devastating life and no one has to bare with it but me