That Empty Space

Discuss the poem That Empty Space with the community...

https://www.poetry.com/poem/136727/that-empty-space

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  Kaytee

  This poem is so amazing. I too have been contemplating what will fill the empty space I feel has always been there. It's not lovers and I have searched for the right spiritual practice to fill it. Maybe I need to fill it myself and realize I am enough. more »

  LikeReply 11 year ago
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    lovingempath

    Thank you Kaylee. I believe that Jesus is always there for us. We just need to open our hearts, and then BELIEVE! I've strayed in all directions looking for a different answer to that 'Empty Space' thing and hope it's not too late when I finally realize, and am ready to admit that I've known the answer all along more »

    LikeReply1 year ago
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    Kaytee

    Maybe I should go back to my Christian roots. Thanks for the nudge. It is surprising that we search and search to fill that emptiness but have known the answer all along.

    LikeReply 11 year ago
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  AIDA

  Wow! This is such a powerful and moving poem. The way you describe the struggle to find inner peace and happiness is truly captivating. I especially love the line, "And all your lovers whispered devotions, don't reach that empty space, in your soul." It speaks to the lonely and isolating feeling of struggling with inner demons.
  
  If I may offer a suggestion, perhaps consider varying the rhyme scheme throughout the poem to keep the reader engaged and surprised. Also, consider experimenting with different rhythms to create a more dynamic read.
  
  Overall, this is a beautiful piece of work, and I can't wait to read more of your writing. Keep up the fantastic work! more »

  LikeReply 11 year ago
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  Symmetry58

  P.S. I just submitted a poem for the contest. I'll be interested to see if you're able to decipher which one is mine having seen my style. ;-)

  LikeReply 11 year ago
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    lovingempath

    I'm on it!! :). Mine hasn't shown up yet...Week-ends aren't usually a good time to expect to see your submitted poems being approved, and I'm not sure if you'll recognize my style with this month's submission...('style' is something I'm still playing with ). Take care, and good luck! more »

    LikeReply 11 year ago
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    Symmetry58

    I completely missed the last judging. The notice probably landed in my junk folder and got deleted. I never even remembered the contest until they sent an email telling me I hadn't won (yet again). LoL

    LikeReply 11 year ago
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    lovingempath

    I am all too familiar with the 'unfortunately, your poem didn't win' (once again) emails. I could paper my walls with them (if they were in paper form :).

    LikeReply1 year ago
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  Symmetry58

  Your ability to express yourself is remarkable, Robin. You deserve to be realized. Your heart is beautiful, as are your words. This moved me deeply.

  LikeReply 11 year ago
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    lovingempath

    That is high praise, from a poet such as yourself Steve. I just kind of flew with a feeling/thought and I'm happy to hear it touched someone. It was a little different from my usual 'dead dog-type' theme . (I may have to switch back. I seem to be able to reach more people :). Thank you sincerely! more »

    LikeReply 11 year ago
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    Symmetry58

    Okay, you really need to stop knocking your dead dog theme. Those are totally uplifting and motivating...if your at the bottom of a barrel and totally unmotivated. I mean, who doesn't love dead dogs??? *sheepish grin* more »

    LikeReply 11 year ago
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    lovingempath

    lol...o.k. When I publish my first 'Dead Dog'-themed poetry book...I'll send you a copy. In all reality I AM working on one with an artist friend who is going to illustrate it (hmmmm just picture that!!). I have a sister who is a nationally-acclaimed author, and has her own publishing company. She's encouraging me to do this. And that ISN'T a lie :) more »

    LikeReply1 year ago
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    Symmetry58

    I always cringe when I leave sarcastic comments to people because I never know how they'll be received. I've had friendships online rife with that sort of semantic that went well...until they didn't, at which point, for some reason unbeknownst to my man senses, the humor had run dry on a given day. That's why I only spritz the sarcasm intermittently so as to not be overkill'ish. You never know what's going on in someone's life on the other end of words, so discretion seems to bode well for longevity's sake.
    
    Just know that I do have a brand of humor and am not afraid to use it on occasion. I am, after all, only a "scientifically proven" male of the species. Thus, the knucklehead-Neanderthal would be my dominant gene. more »

    LikeReply 11 year ago
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    lovingempath

    Well...I personally love a little sarcastic bantering. Like you, there are many people who don't know how to read the intended humor behind some of the things I say. Their loss :)

    LikeReply1 year ago
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    lovingempath

    P.S...I actually submitted two poems last month. The other was 'Bobbi'. It actually received one vote, where this one went totally unnoticed. It really isn't a good idea to submit two poems, because you may be competing against yourself. But I may do it again this month...just because ...:) more »

    LikeReply1 year ago
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    Symmetry58

    I've submitted two poems a couple times myself what with all that excess money falling out of my pockets and such. Nothing worse than having more money than one knows what to do with. Entire poetry contest. Turns out it gave folks the opportunity to pass over two of my poems instead of one. That's fun.
    
    The truth is, I don't mind losing the contest if the winning poems are worthy, but I've seen some that looked like someone with a labotomy decided to take every word they couldn't spell and toss them together to see what happens. That's a bit annoying if I don't mind saying so.
    
    Just for shitz and gigglez I'm gonna toss in a silly one right now. See if you can find it when judging. more »

    LikeReply 11 year ago
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    lovingempath

    You're hilarious. And yes...I'm with you when it comes to having excess money falling from my pockets (sarcastic grin). This last month's winners were great choices. 'The Tree house' ripped my heart out. The prior month, I think the poem that came in 2nd was my favorite. Oh wait...that was me!! :). The winnings justify my spending-spree on more than one poem (to be overlooked by other participants :). I don't mind losing at all either, if the winners are 'worthy'. I have to agree with you on the 'lobotomy' poetry. Hey...there's an idea!!! I'll let you know if it turns out alright:). I can usually tell right away whether or not I have even a slight chance at a much-coveted mug. Last month; even though I knew I had several votes, still shocked me. I had tagged half-a-dozen poems I thought were better put together than mine. It must have been that 'dead doggie' theme that won for me. more »

    LikeReply 11 year ago
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    Symmetry58

    I meant to say "enter poetry contest," not "entire." I'm a stickler for grammar, if'n ya hadn't noticed.

    LikeReply 11 year ago
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    Symmetry58

    "I have a sister who is a nationally-acclaimed author, and has her own publishing company." - How did I miss this??? That's pretty damn impressive. Do me a favor - NEVER allow her to see my hoopla. I've suffered enough abuse on this site to fulfill four lifetime requirements. She'd rip through me like pigs on a pickle. more »

    LikeReply 11 year ago
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    Symmetry58

    In the end, what is a better poem among a plethora of poetry that is well written? I mean, for me personally, I like well written poems, but, moreover, poetry that moves/relates (to) me in some way. Everyone's "better" would vary based on experience, taste, frame of mind, etc.
    What moves me, and what I consider "better," may be trash to others. I read some poems here and am immediately turned off. Cliche' jump starts a vomit for me. If I'm in a certain place in my head, then I don't care if it's Frost or Shakespeare; whereas I could find those same poems brilliant when I'm in a more healthy head space.
    
    So, one must wonder, is it the poetry itself that is "better" or our states of consciousness at a given moment as a reciprocal value in relation to what resonates with us at that moment in time??? Hmmmm....
    
    Made a mountain out of that molehill didn't I? :-P more »

    LikeReply 11 year ago
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    lovingempath

    My moods shift so much, that I don't dare pick my winner right away. One day it might be hitting me in the right place, and the next...well, you know what I mean. And some poetry hits my 'soft spot' but if everything else is off; that enters the equation. But I do agree with all that you said here...including the 'mole-hill' thing, which I just added to :) more »

    LikeReply 11 year ago
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    lovingempath

    LOL! :)

    LikeReply1 year ago
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    lovingempath

    Yes...I had to ponder that for a moment and then choose not to obsess over it :).

    LikeReply1 year ago
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    lovingempath

    I think I've already spotted your 'silly' poem. And I'm pretty sure you may have a winner there :).

    LikeReply1 year ago
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    Symmetry58

    I wrote that silly thing years ago. I figured, if I'm going to lose every month it might as well be justified. If I'm a betting man, that thing ain't winning nuttin. LoL

    LikeReply1 year ago
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    lovingempath

    hmmmmm...maybe I'm on the wrong track..It just seemed like something you might do to make a statement. I'll have to re-think my approach to this treasure hunt :)

    LikeReply1 year ago