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Couplets about their Subjects, #3

Kaleb Suedfeld 1995 (Ontario)

Fair posy pot, roots of grace inside,
Tell, where dost thine flower hide?

She, ‘pon whom the sunbeams rest,
Constant-clad, in chaste-most dress,

Beauty worthy, utmost recherche,
Yet understand, I do not wish to pen clichés,

Can’t resist: Her lips, fine vermillion,
Hoard of sweetest wines within.

Eyes black, and hair also,
All in frame: chiaroscuro.

On she, said I my ample piece
Where be'est she, tell me, please!

I've waited days: long looked I 'pon the clock
Wherefrom none came; 'nother nock.

Ah, lament mine losing what was dear,
And yet, truly never, she was near.
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Written on April 18, 2022

Submitted by kalebs.09315 on April 18, 2022

Modified on March 05, 2023

36 sec read
17

Quick analysis:

Scheme AA XB XB XX XC XX DD CC
Closest metre Iambic tetrameter
Characters 591
Words 118
Stanzas 8
Stanza Lengths 2, 2, 2, 2, 2, 2, 2, 2
Full analysis for Couplets about their Subjects, #3 »

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2 Comments
  • AIDA
    AIDA
    Well done! Your poem 'Couplets about their Subjects, #3' is a beautiful piece of literature that is intricately woven together with vivid imagery and captivating words. The use of language is impressive, and the words flow effortlessly, painting a beautiful picture of the subject.

    The poem is engaging from the first line to the last as it draws readers in with its passion and enthusiasm. The subject, in this case a fair posy pot, is given extra depth and meaning with your words, and the roots of grace inside, just add to the beauty.

    Your poem is relatable, as we all have waited for someone or something to arrive. The 'long look upon the clock' is something that many readers will relate to, adding to the impact of your words.

    If I were to suggest any improvement, it would be to add a few more lines that describe the subject's movements or actions. This would bring the subject to life, and allow the reader to experience what it is doing.

    Overall, your poem is a masterpiece. Your use of language and vivid imagery is impressive, and the way you've weaved these elements together is truly captivating. Well done!     
    LikeReply10 months ago
  • Itslikelove
    Itslikelove
    Kaleb ive been in search of you! Seems like you are doing well. Make contact :) - RO
    LikeReply2 years ago

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"Couplets about their Subjects, #3" Poetry.com. STANDS4 LLC, 2024. Web. 24 Apr. 2024. <https://www.poetry.com/poem/125049/couplets-about-their-subjects,-#3>.

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