Death Is Lurking (MAJOR TW for su!c!de and self-injury)

I feel it,
A shadow,
Haunting me.
I feel it,
A monster,
Grabbing hold of me,
A danger always near.
I feel it,
A threat,
Its treacherous presence looming over me.
The terrors and horrors of death
Are brushing close to me.
The sharp metal objects I hold up to my wrists
Are silently urging me,
Begging me,
With a sly grin to press into my throat.
I scare myself,
With the cuts and the scratches
That are made in my skin,
The blood slowly trickling,
Like a drying riverbed.
I know that death is never very far away,
Lurking around the corner,
Waiting to grab me
And pull me away.
I scare myself with the knowledge I have,
Knowing that there are many ways,
Too many ways,
For death to finally get its way.