Ambiguous Loss

I didn’t mean to, I promise. It was a slow progression, however not slow enough where I can say I didn’t notice it. People say there are those friends who you can not talk to forever and then see them and it’s like no time has passed. I believed in that, for I thought all of my friendships were like that. But I think after time something starts to build. Or maybe the opposite, something begins to wither. For every time you see them again it begins to feel less and less of how it used to. I believe there is a tipping point, and no matter how much effort put fourth after that point, it never will be the same. Strangers. I think that may be one of the most painful of human experiences. Looking into the eyes of someone you once knew, where you were their other half, and then no longer knowing who that person is. People always say that “if you don’t act now, you’re going to regret it”, but to be quite honest, I think it would have been better not knowing. It hurts more knowing that no matter how hard I tried it was over, there was nothing left. I would have rather continued life sad that I lost her, but thinking it could have worked if I really wanted it to. I honestly thought she would come back, I thought they all would. However the relationship has ran its course. There is no coming back.