She

She just wishes she could show you how she feels with one click of a button. She compounds ways in her head that involve you finally seeing why she cares so much. She crosses her fingers hoping you could see how not replying is s form of rejection to her. A wound that tried to embed itself deep since childhood, yet she remains positive and keeps ten toes down. Dreaming of the day you understand why it’s always been you for her. Somehow she finds the strength to push forward even on the days you refuse to acknowledge she is there. Her heart is so big. Guarded as it’s easily broken, somehow, she disposes all that trauma when she is near you.  Wanting all to feel how she does, love as she does, give as she will, even if it’s her last. Why?  Because she is genuine without expectancy.  She wishes you understood how small moments with you mean the world to her. Hence why she battles some of the things she dares to say, as consequence could be you shutting her out forever. Wondering why do things have to be only when you are open to them. She just wants to love on you daily and get that same love back. She wants to be your Mrs. Change your mind on what affection, loyalty, dedication and support means since she knows you have been scarred previously. She isn’t them. She promises to handle you and your family with care. She just asks that you allow her to and also be willing to give her the same. She has a life, a great one outside of you. It shocks her that in the midst of it all, she can still paint images of why you should be incorporated in her daily schedule. This fight she been in a long time. A race with miles unending and as she grows tired, her heart is still drawn to you. So she never gives up. Knowing we in our 30’s and change at this point isn’t promised. She still has faith her love will reflect on you and you will Embrace it, allow her to be your better half. She just wishes she could show you how she feels with a click of a button. But will you truly allow her to? There is nothing you will miss if you just choose to settle down with a real one. No lack only gain will be your resolution. She offers more then just sex. That’s just a demonstration of her attraction to you. She could be your peace, prayer warrior, partner in all things. A mother to your babies willingly and a helping hand in a world you feel you already maintaining. She just wants you to express you need her in return,Selah. That you want her as much as she does you. But will you truly allow her to? People often wonder why she is so intense, so deep, so ALL IN. She is just intentional in her interaction as she has blessings she wishes to give. But only wants to give them to just one. That one is YOU. She been around still here even when you fall back n pop up. She is there..she just wishes she could show you how she feels with a click of s button. She writes of pleasure even though some phrases show the pain she hides. She writes these messages to you, she knows one day, if you really for her, you will join hands and emotions, be unafraid to try at love just one more time. Only this time it will be with HER, a solid one, your time won’t be wasted and finally an exhale will be exchanged between two hearts who searched high n low , not realizing who they wanted was right there In front of them . But will you allow her to?

Selah.

-Nesh