Make a Change

It's 4am and I am pacing the floors again. Seems like this is all I ever do. I have been down this road many times before. The words "I trust you" always flow from my lips when in my mind I am yelling "I will never trust you again". You have no clue that I saw the two of you out at the club holding each other close, when you should be at home loving me. Tonight I am going to make a change. When you come home, your key will no longer work. I have been hurt too many times. Now I am taking out the trash and will have to learn to love myself again. I say that I will never love again. That is only Just until my right kind of wrong comes around again. I've loved some cheaters, abusers, and some heartbreakers. I've had to be a fighter, a detective, and a survivor. But in the end, I'm afraid to start over because I just know, I will love the wrong one again. Every single time I think I am over you, all those feelings come rushing back in. I just don't think I can hold out much longer. Before I know, I will be looking for my phone. Your number is burned into my memory. Just as I had thought, I am trying to make something work in my head that I know has been dead from the beginning. Just then I hear the words. I've loved some cheaters, abusers, and some heartbreakers. I've had to be a fighter, a detective, and a survivor. This time I want a change. So please, I don't want to love the wrong one again.