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ACB KOs OZ FOR ICC

Phil Roberts 1957 (Melbourne)



The politically correct morons
Now in charge of Australian cricket,
Are blind to the facts of life
As though they’re wearing blinkers.

Their massive, underachieving egos
Have knocked the Aussie onto their bums,
They refuse to select a winning team
Because they don’t like Andrew Symonds.

Because Symonds likes to have a drink
And to make a little noise,
And dares to say New South Wales cheated
By hiring an imported rent-boy.

A rent-boy named McCullum
Was brought as a ringer into a final,
And when Andrew Symonds spoke the truth
His words of wisdom were cruelly repelled.

Now Australia heads to South Africa
Sending their second- or third-eleven,
With little chance to win a single test
Thanks to the ACB getting even:

Getting even with Andrew Symonds
Because he dared to speak the truth,
By mentioning Mark Taylor was a cheat
And presenting them with proof.

The morons in high places
Are determined to bring the Aussies down,
Rather than check their inflated egos
They’ll see us grovelling on the ground.

Andrew Hilditch, a reject from test cricket
Who never really understood the game,
Now controls the selection process
Guaranteeing to make our test team lame.

In the late 1990s, match-fixing came to light
Hansie Cronje and others were in the news,
When they confessed to taking money
To ensure their countries lose.

But the ICC did almost nothing; not even
Investigating the world cups of ’92 and ’96,
So they’re unlikely to investigate the Aussie selectors
Though what they’re doing now truly stinks.

THE END
© Copyright 2021 Philip Roberts
Melbourne, Victoria, Australia

About this poem

If you're not a cricket fan, and you don't know how readily Cricket Australia will beat up on its own team to suck up to the idiots on the International Cricket Council, then this poem will mean nothing to you!

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Written on February 07, 2009

Submitted by PHIL_ROBERTS on August 16, 2021

1:19 min read
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Phil Roberts

I am 64 and loves cats, rock music, and horror fiction and poetry more…

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