Reborn from ashes

Reborn From Ashes
When you kissed me, you kissed my soul
When you'd say you loved me I felt the pull
The want for existence, the need to feel whole

I was born again like a phoenix from its ashes
I tried to tell you I cant change what my past is
Now without you its a disease, a spreading cancer and its masses

It's leaking to my brain and I just cant tthink straight
I try so hard but I'm stuck in this numb state
No matter how hard I try my efforts steer one direction, one place

I need to be in your arms or I get sick
In the head, in my body, but mostly in my soul
and the time keeps passing my internal clock louder with each tick

It hurts so badly I know
It's no ones fault but my own
I'm the one that let you slip, let you go

I'll scream your name until I'm blue in the face
I'm screaming to the stars, I've been screaming for days
It's heavens way of giving me the angel, a small taste, only to then take her away

Only to watch me kill her, watch me fail
Like they knew when real became really real, I'd bail
Check the wind and away with my heart I'd sail

My heart is so swollen from the constant creation of my tears
It swells and aches for loosing you was my biggest fear
And futures have become more than unclear

I lost my angel and helped to clip her wings
I have no right to feel what this brings
All I can do is wait until the days she sings

She will sing again, my fallen angel will regain her wings
The only thing I can hope for is that when she does, its with me
When she does so, maybe we can be happy

The pain will subside and the memories will remain
We'll notice it from time to time, we're forever stained
But like the phoenix we can be reborn again

Kennith Bowens