PIRACY ON THE LOW SEAS

Phil Roberts 1957 (Melbourne)



The Meter Maids are on the move
They’re coming south and coming fast,
Their prospects sure are promising
Because their piracy was vast.

The Gold Coast Meter Maids
Have lied, cheated, and stolen,
To put together a mighty team
In a style that’s not beholden.

For the Meter Maids got to steal
Ablett and many other superstars,
So they can win a chook raffle
Yes, and so they’ll win it fast.

Not years to build a winning team
Like the others mainly did,
They’re a blight in the sight of fair play
But a blight we can’t get rid.

For a bookkeeper runs the AFL
With dollar signs instead of eyes,
A man who does what e’er he will
Who cheats, and steals, and lies.

So it’s a chook raffle in year eleven
Just like we’ve had before,
For the Lions, the Cows, and Weagles
To make our indignation soar.

The Meter Maids will win the raffle
And gloat on what they took,
But for followers of fair play,
Well … We think it’s mighty crook.

The Cats, the Mags, the Saints, and Dogs
Have all been treated poorly,
Democracy may not yet be broken
But they sure have bent it sorely.

Now decency is not allowed
Not in the bloody AFL,
And when it comes to doing right
They tell us all to go to Hell!

The bookkeeper just has dollar signs
Where most of us have eyeballs,
So he’ll let the Meter Maids reign
And see the Lions fall.

THE END
© Copyright 2021, Philip Roberts
Melbourne, Victoria, Australia

About this poem

Written in 2011, about the corrupt way the Gold Coast Suns were allowed to steal 16 players to put together a new team, instead of having to start from scratch, when joining the AFL. Strangely, it didn't help them, since ten years later they are still a joke team.

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Written on January 22, 2011

Submitted by PHIL_ROBERTS on July 20, 2021

Modified on April 13, 2023

1:18 min read
11

Quick analysis:

Scheme XAXA BCDC EXFA DGHG EIXI CJBJ FKHK XLCL XEXX XXXX XXX
Closest metre Iambic tetrameter
Characters 1,354
Words 261
Stanzas 11
Stanza Lengths 4, 4, 4, 4, 4, 4, 4, 4, 4, 4, 3

Phil Roberts

I turn 65 on the 31st of January 2022. I love cats, rock music, and horror fiction and poetry more…

All Phil Roberts poems | Phil Roberts Books

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