Smoke – Part 1

My body was starting to burn
To ashes, as the reward
That I had earned.

I was too happy to just accept
Being dissolved
Into dust within God’s spirit,
As previously resolved.

While I had hoped to sacrifice
Myself while still free,
The flames of hope were quenched,
Without any glee.

My dearest and nearest had only just departed;
Seeing me completely burnt.
I was left, scarred, waiting desperately
For someone to return.

Half ashes rest as a sickly mess
Under the cover of my dark smoke.
I was despising my life, myself,
As nothing but badly charred coke.

I was hoping just to be free,
But someone determined
It was not to be.

My ashes were destined
To end up in the ocean;
Now I was left, still unburnt,
With clouded emotions.

I, as smoke, would vanish
Into nothing up in the sky;
Nobody knew about my fate now,
Nor was I told why