For Alicia

Soooooo this is kinda long lol, I think this is the third longest poem I’ve ever written

How can a woman make me feel like a woman?
How can her touch render me speechless?
How can her lips wipe all other thought in my mind?
How can her voice make me so wet that I start to drip down my thighs?
And how can her eyes be so alluring and hungry at the same time?
I want her to touch me
Venture in places I refused to let anyone enter before
Hold me
Tight as if you never want me to go
Breathe me in
As if I was a breath of fresh air and you have been drowning
She says she wants to be dominated
But she has already taken control of my mind
So the question is now
Am I in love with this person
Or am I just really enjoying the experience?
I fell in love with her before we’ve even touched
Her strength and beauty captivated me before we spoke in person
I seek her counsel
Because I trust her thought process on a practical level
I want to talk to her about my day
But I wouldn’t mind just listening to her talk for hours
I wonder if she knows she is special to me
That meeting her is like a dream that I don’t want to wake up from
That the love I have to offer
I have kept closely guarded is finally ready to be poured from its bottomless bowl
But
I know this is not a fairytale
It’s life
And everything comes with a price
That weeping may endure for a night but joy comes in the morning
But how long is the weeping?
And one day I’ll look at her and her smile is gone
I’d pray to God for endurance to weather those storms
Because I am weak but it is God who makes me strong
And I want to see her in every season
I want to be there when her tears fall
I want to see her when there is a spring in her step
I want to receive all of her hugs cause they remind me of summer
And I want to be around her when she’s distant like winter
I want to experience every one of her seasons
Though I can’t help but wonder if she’ll be able to handle mine
She thinks I’m nice but I can be so so so mean at times
And I am afraid that when I hurt her
Will I be able to recognize the pain I have caused
Will she tell me?
Will tears be in her eyes?
I hate seeing her cry
Will I remember that she loves strawberry ice cream?
Will I remember that she loves flowers and candles that smell nice?
Will I remember that she likes red jolly ranchers,  strawberry pocky, and ripping the heads from gummy bears?
Will I remember these things
But most of all will I remember to apologize
How can a woman make me feel like a woman?
I hope that I make her feel the same way
I hope that I make her feel beautiful like she does me
I hope that she knows that my biggest desire for her is happiness and a endless amount of joy
I just want her to be happy
Even if it's not with me