kenya_s's Saved Poems

Have you ever heard that elephants have wonderful memory?
It's true!
People have always told me that I share that same memory.
I remember everything that has ever happened to me since I was two years old.

My only fear is, what if I forget?

...

You claim you are this down to earth dude but we both know how you really are.
We know how you treated me.
It must have been nice to have everyone wrapped around your finger.

Not me, not anymore.

All the lies I put up with, the red flags,...

You would assume that since I'm manic it just means I'm more hyper than usual.
That I will just calm down soon.
Being manic isn't at all fun.
Trouble falling asleep let alone even wanting to sleep. My brain tells me I don't need it.
I guess...

I look out my window and can sense that you're out there.
Out there waiting for me to step foot onto the porch.
The moment I close the door behind me, my senses start to heighten.
Where are you?
I know you will start to follow me once I begin...

All I ever want is your arms around me.
They keep me so warm.
Especially on a cold frigid night.
Kiss me.
Take my bad thoughts and shove them in a dumpster.
Make me forget to breathe, just for a moment.
Hold my face into your hands.
Caress my...

Every day I wake up to a lie.
"I love you."
No, you don't.
Go to sleep with a lie.
"I love you."
No, you don't.
Good try though.
Lord knows the million words coming out of your mouth daily is all lies.
Why can't you just be honest with me?
...

Spread your wings,
Even if they are battered and broken.
Shake the dust off of them.
Flap a couple times to feel the wind beneath.
Feel that beautiful bright sunshine.
Go be free butterfly.
You don't deserve any of this abuse.
This isn't...

As the voices in my head got evil, the dishes were starting to pile up.
Just how I handle my problems, I hide them.
That's what I did with the plates.
Out of sight, out of mind mindset kind of vibe.
For days they start to disappear.
Once I...

I see the sun, the stars, and the moon.
I see the colors of a rainbow after a storm.
When the light touches those brown eyes,
it looks like a pool of warm honey.
The way your face lights up as you talk about the things you love.
The way you...

Look at me now!
If only you could, huh?
You once knew me as ignorant, bitch, cunt, and a scary ass.
Any sudden noises and movements made me cower.
Yelling was my cup of coffee.
There was no "good days" with you around.
Like a leech, you sucked...

Thought you could keep me trapped in that small cage?
You really thought that I wouldn't find my worth?
That I would just rely on you financially?
Not even one thought came to your mind that I would begin to love myself again.
Now here we are...

Yes, this is true.
There will be a time when you will reach out to caress my soft glowing skin but,
I will not be there.
Once you are finished cooking,
I will not compliment you on how much the garlic goes well with it.
When your hair is...

Look, I don't mean to fuck up.
I don't plan to make you angry.
I never dreamed of being this way.
I'm sorry.
Please lower your voice, I know what I did wrong.
No please, don't be so mean.
Stop, you're scaring me.
I'm sorry.
Sorry that I say...

Why do you do that?
You keep building me up with your kind words just to throw me back to the ground.

I believed you again.
Like I always do.
"I promise this will be the last time."
"I promise I didn't talk to her."
"I promise this was the...

As I was starting to grow older, I noticed how attractive brunettes were to me.
How in movies sometimes the women were more appealing to me then the men.
Once I turned four-teen years old I came out of the closet as most would say.
I always knew...

I met you twice before that special night.
The first time was so random.
You came up to talk to my at the time person.
I hid behind him until you both were saying your goodbyes.

My eyes met yours and butterflies started to flutter in the...

Do you know what it's like?
To go to our old familiar places and have flashbacks play in my mind like an old romance movie?
Except our ending wasn't so happy was it?

Do you ever get those "How are you and- doing?"
I wonder how you respond.
...

I envision you in the shower.
The water running down your body creating the most beautiful waterfall.
Bubbles contouring your muscles.
Soap cleansing your soft skin.
The scent of cool ocean in the air.
Every hair flip makes me quiver.
Your...

Roses are red,
Violets are blue.
I'd do anything to not think of you.
You haunt my dreams,
tell me lies.
All the screams,
it's just a dream is what I don't realize.

I begged you to leave me alone,
Even locked doors you couldn't be stopped....