FINAL SCRIPT
by
Come down from the stage
foot- lights fade
back to the green-room--
return
all make-ups and wig or pads
mask or color- strips
cast aside,and wash off-- clean.
If further can
come back in naked faith
to the stage
where
tired vistors are moving out.
And
take your final stand
speak it loud ----
' I am now here and
beyond those scripted words--
I repeat
I am.now, the real one -
before you !'
foot- lights fade
back to the green-room--
return
all make-ups and wig or pads
mask or color- strips
cast aside,and wash off-- clean.
If further can
come back in naked faith
to the stage
where
tired vistors are moving out.
And
take your final stand
speak it loud ----
' I am now here and
beyond those scripted words--
I repeat
I am.now, the real one -
before you !'
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Poetry.com 3.3 out of 5 based on 3 votes.
great structure done here
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I would've given 41/2 stars if it were possible, because...
It's a Yahtzee roll as far as structure, so the syncopation is way off.
However, the concept is very good... thoughts are complete & well conveyed,
With a bit of research on what makes a poem, a poem & a rewrite you'll have a winner here.
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I liked a lot of things about it as the words were great but I don't think that the spacing and structure was thought out that well. i think that you could of done a little better but Overall its okay.
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